Top Ten Lists

Top Ten List

TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN THE OFFICE AREN'T

  • 10. I need to whip it out by 5.
  • 9. Mind if I use your laptop?
  • 8. Just stick it in my box.
  • 7. If I have to lick one more, I'll gag!
  • 6. I want it on my desk, NOW!!!!
  • 5. HMMMMM, I think it's out of fluid!
  • 4. My equipment is so old, it takes forever to finish.
  • 3. It's an entry level position.
  • 2. When do you think you'll be getting off today?

  • And the number one thing that sounds dirty, but at the office isn't:
  • 1. It's not fair. I do all the work while he just sits there!!!
  • TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN A LAW FIRM AREN'T

  • 10. Have you looked through her briefs?
  • 9. He is one hard judge.
  • 8. Counselor, let's do it in chambers.
  • 7. Her attorney withdrew at the last minute.
  • 6. Is it a penal offense?
  • 5. Better leave the handcuffs on.
  • 4. For $200 an hour, she better be good!
  • 3. Can you get him to drop his suit?
  • 2. The judge gave her the stiffiest one he could.

  • And the number one thing that sounds dirty, but in law isn't:
  • 1. Think you can get me off?
  • TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN GOLF AREN'T

  • 10. Damn, my shaft is bent.
  • 9. After 18 holes, I can barely walk.
  • 8. You really whacked the hell out of that sucker.
  • 7. Look at the size of his putter.
  • 6. Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more.
  • 5. Mind if I join your threesome?
  • 4. Stand with your back turned and drop it.
  • 3. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip.
  • 2. Nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired.

  • And the number one thing that sounds dirty, but in golf isn't:
  • 1. Hold up! I need to wash my balls first.
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